WE WON! An incredible effort from the team, winning 3-2 against Cov! Big thank you to everyone who came out to support!
For the full team list and match report, check out the Varsity 2019 section on the website here
16/02/19 - Mixed vs Medics (episode III return of the mixed)
I'm writing the match report which tells us 2 things: 1) I must be a dick most days 2) you guys need to get a bit more creative with your picks 😉
The team put in a massive shift today and came out on top 1-0 against a tough Warwick medics side.
The game got off to a cagey start with both teams finding their feet. Probs for the best as Alex didn't actually have the right keeper kit on (you had 1 job 🙄😉). Luckily Alistair was a lamb and ran and got it for him so all was well. I can't remember most of the first half tbh apart from I did my standard talk throughout the whole match and chat a lot of shit. I do remember the goal tho cos I was involved, and as it was the only goal I'm gonna go through it in some detail for yall. So settle back, get a drink, maybe find a blanket to cuddle up under with any significant others you may or may not have, and let me tell you all about it. I'll give you a minute just to get comfy....you ready? Okay let's go. Ella made a beauty of a run, behind their defence, I passed it through some geezers legs (now guys, I don't like to brag but was very happy with this pass - on record he was good tbf - and I'd finally gotten one over on him yeet), Ella controlled it beautifully and headed for a 1 on 1 with their keeps. He ran out and Ella.... ran straight into him. This turned out to be a stroke of pure genius, selfless play cos what she did was take out the keeper, meaning when it bounced back I could slot it into an open goal (despite trying my hardest to miss and going post and in). Ella actually injured herself in this so that's the kind of commitment we need *cough* Andy *cough*. Can't rememeber shit of the rest of the half tho so soz if I missed something good you did. Know we had lots of chances tho and really put some good pressure on and were worthy of our lead. Our defence was solid and they were getting no change out of it.
We went in 1-0 up and were reasonably confident.
The second half, man that was a good half. First half of it we absolutely dominated them (I'm talking bdsm shit) up front and really should have come away with some more goals. Ellen was an absolute beast in midfield tackling, intercepting and playing the ball around beautifully. Katarina had her defender in her back pocket all day long was always in a great position and always beat her man and got the pass away (soz probs should have finished more of them). Oli did good things but atm can't remember any specifics apart from when he took it round 2 (tekkers tbf) for a 2 on 1 but rather than sweaty it to me for an open goal he shanked it wide on his reverse (I still haven't forgiven bitch). Second half of second half we had much more torrid task with medics having a alot of ball and putting a lot of pressure on. Radhika Billy Pledge Baker and Lydia put in some brilliant last ditch tackles with Billy even saving one on the line (didn't realise you had it in you pal 😉). Lydia displayed some new revolutionary defending involving her hands (catching the ball and earning a green card) and her face (trooper playing on still). The match came to an exciting climax with everyone defending for their lives (parked that bus pretty damn well thank you very much). Some super saves and strong tackles led to a superb result for Warwick. We had 1 last chance on the last play of game we got a counter. I got passed the ball about halfway between the 23 and the halfway line and headed to goal. It was at this moment I realised I was cramping up. Managed to run through it and get 1 on 1 with the keeper, put it through his legs to run round and finish...but at this point my legs actually died and I fell over. AND NOONE CAME TO HELP ME STRETCH THE CRAMP OUT WHILST I LAY IMPETENT IN THEIR D. I also missed a chance at another goal cry.
MOTM was Kat for another superb (SUPERB I SAY) performance up and down The wing. Also shout out to el who teamed up brillisntly with her - all our attack came through them 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I got DOTD for once again 🤨 but not sure what for really... It could have been the cramping up again or maybe taking my trackies off in the middle of the pitch just as we were trying to start.. Maybe other things idk.
Next match is varsity and the signs are certainly promising!
Shout out to Alistair for hearing my plea for someone to write this for me cos I was so busy (I did embellish parts, not sure you'll be able to work out where😉). And also f**k the freshers, especially pledge. That is all.
Written by Nick Metcalfe
Between our Mixed Hockey, Netball and Lacrosse sessions we raised £198, whilst trying new sports and making friends in the process! 💗
10/02/19 UWMXDHC vs Reading
Eve put an early bid in for DOD by waking up 25 minutes after the meeting time, blaming her flat mate who had come into her room and turned off her blaring alarm earlier that morning.
Despite this we turned up on time, in the rain, and spirits were high before push back. Billy, in goal and having not used the Tesco bag in the car journey down, was suffering from a severe hangover. They were early calls for him to be DOD after he kicked a ball into Mary’s head before we had started. (maybe this was why Mary had to ask what a “16” was during halftime 🤷♂️).
The game started with a Zulu, Billy being boshed by the opposition keeper and losing the kickoff. He retreated to his goal, took off his helmet and ‘took a breather’ 🤢. The first half was scrappy but Warwick looked to be edging it. Luke’s mazy runs allowed him to get a shot off; firing just past the second floor windows of a house overlooking the pitch on his reverse. Scared for their accommodation the Reading players (one of them being Oli’s twin Tom) wiped Luke out the next time; the referee didn’t feel the need to card anyone! Reading pushed on the break with the half nearing the end and nicked a goal. HT 0-1.
Charlie’s words of wisdom at half time fired up the squad. I (Oli) came on 10 minutes later and was back on the bench two minutes later having been shown a green card. The ref wasn’t a big fan of my chicken style running and took exception to my wings clipping the opposition player. He got more annoyed when I then tried to play on having forgotten that I was meant to leave the pitch. I can’t remember much of what happened next, but Lydia’s Instagram story summed it up with a message of how many goals would we lose by? 3 was the answer.
Mentions for MOM were between Alex, who played well on the wing and Pledge. Pledge had apparently saved up some money by not buying pills this week and used it to good effect to bag the MOM award. Solid work 🎉!
DOD was well contested and I deservedly picked up the honour after a brief but eventful debut performance and being a dick to pledge, who did play very well.
P.S shoutout to a solid debut from Kate!
P.S.S shoutout to Ganney for concealing my love bite, I don’t think anyone even noticed
Written by Oli Bradbury👌